3 Verses

I'm the illest rapper to hold a cordless
Patrolling corners
Looking for hookers to punch in the mouth with a roll of quarters
I'm meaner in action
Than Rosco beating James Tarteenyer (?)
And smackin his back with vacuum cleaner attachments
I grew up in the wild hood
As a hazardous youth
With a fucked up childhood
That I used as an excuse
And aint shit changed
But kept the same mindstate
Since the third time that I failed 9th grade
You probably think that I'm a negative person don't be so sure of it
I don't promote violence I just encourage it
I laugh at the sight of death
As I fall down a cement flight of steps
And land inside a bed of spider webs
So throw caution to the wind
You and a friend
Can jump off of a bridge and if you live, do it again
Shit, why not? Blow your brain out
I'm blowing mine out
Fuck it, you only live once you might as well die now

It's only fair to warn
I was born with a set of horns
And metaphors attached to my damn umbulical cord
Warlord of rap little bastard with a two by four board
That smashed into your Honda Accord
With a 4 door Ford
But I'm more toward droppin an accapella
And choppin' a fella
To mozarella
Worse than a hellacopta propella
Got you locked in the cella
With your skeleton showing
Developing anorexia
While I'm standin next to ya
Eating a full course meal watching you starve to death
With an IV in your veins
Feeding you liquid darvicet
Pumping you full of drugs
Pull the plugs
On the gunshot victims full of bullet slugs
Who were picked up in an ambulance
And driven
To receiving with the asses ripped outta they pants
And given
A less than 20 percent chance
Of living
Have a possible placement
It's a hospital patient
Storing the dead bodies in grandma's little basement
Doctor Kevorkian has arrived
To perform an autopsy on you while you scream "I'M STILL ALIVE!"
Driving a rusty scalpel in through the top of your scalp
And pulling your adams apple out through your mouth
Better call the fire department
I've hired a arson
To set fire to carpet
And burn up your entire apartment
I'm a liar to start shit (?)
Got your bitch wrapped around my dick
So tight you need a crobar to pry her apart wit

Met a retarded kid named Greg with a wooden leg
Snatched it off and beat him over the fucking head with the peg
Go to bed with the keg wake up with the 40
Mixed up with Alka Seltzer and Formula 44D
Fuck an acid tab I'll strap the whole sheet to my forehead
Wait until it absorbed in and fell to the floor dead
No more said case closed end of discussion
I'm blowin up like spontaneous human combustion
Leaving you in the aftermath of holocaust and traumas
Cross the bombas (?)
We blowin up your house killing your parents
and coming back to get your foster mommas
And I'm as good at keeping a promise as Nostradamus
Cause I aint making no more threats
I'm doing drivebys in tinted Corvettes on Vietnam war vets
I'm more or less sick in the head
Maybe more cause I smoked crack (?)
today, yesterday, and the day before sabbath
Walk the block with a labrador
Strapit more corral for war than El Salvador
Foul style galore
Verbal cow manure
Coming together like the eyebrow on Al B. Sure

97 Bonnie and Clyde


* this is the same lyrics as "Just the Two of Us" from his EP

Just the two of us.. (8X)

[Eminem]
Baby your da-da loves you (hey)
And I'ma always be here for you (hey) no matter what happens
You're all I got in this world
I would never give you up for nothin
Nobody in this world is ever gonna keep you from me
I love you

C'mon Hai-Hai, we goin to the beach
Grab a couple of toys and let da-da strap you in the car seat
Oh where's mama? She's takin a little nap in the trunk
Oh that smell (whew!) da-da musta runned over a skunk
Now I know what you're thinkin - it's kind of late to go swimmin
But you know your mama, she's one of those type of women
that do crazy things, and if she don't get her way, she'll throw a fit
Don't play with da-da's toy knife, honey, let go of it (no!)
And don't look so upset, why you actin bashful?
Don't you wanna help da-da build a sand castle? (yeah!)
And mama said she wants to show how far she can float
And don't worry about that little boo-boo on her throat
It's just a little scratch - it don't hurt, her was eatin
dinner while you were sweepin and spilled ketchup on her shirt
Mama's messy isn't she? We'll let her wash off in the water
and me and you can pway by ourselves, can't we?

Just the two of us.. (2X)
And when we ride!
Just the two of us.. (2X)
Just you and I!
Just the two of us.. (2X)
And when we ride!
Just the two of us.. (2X)
Just you and I!

See honey.. there's a place called heaven and a place called hell
A place called prison and a place called jail
And da-da's probably on his way to all of em except one
Cause mama's got a new husband and a stepson
And you don't want a brother do ya? (Nah)
Maybe when you're old enough to understand a little better
I'll explain it to ya
But for now we'll just say mama was real real bad
She was bein mean to dad and made him real real mad
But I still feel sad that I put her on time-out
Sit back in your chair honey, quit tryin to climb out (WAHH!)
I told you it's okay HaiHai, wanna ba-ba?
Take a night-night? Nan-a-boo, goo-goo ga-ga?
Her make goo-goo ca-ca? Da-da change your dia-dee
Clean the baby up so her can take a nighty-nighty
Your dad'll wake her up as soon as we get to the water
Ninety-seven Bonnie and Clyde, me and my daughter

Just the two of us.. (2X)
And when we ride!
Just the two of us.. (2X)
Just you and I!
Just the two of us.. (2X)
And when we ride!
Just the two of us.. (2X)
Just you and I!

Wake up sweepy head we're here, before we pway
we're gonna take mama for a wittle walk along the pier
Baby, don't cry honey, don't get the wrong idea
Mama's too sweepy to hear you screamin in her ear (ma-maa!)
That's why you can't get her to wake, but don't worry
Da-da made a nice bed for mommy at the bottom of the lake
Here, you wanna help da-da tie a rope around this rock? (yeah!)
We'll tie it to her footsie then we'll roll her off the dock
Ready now, here we go, on the count of free..
One.. two.. free.. WHEEEEEE! (whoooooshhhhh)
There goes mama, spwashin in the wa-ta
No more fightin wit dad, no more restraining order
No more step-da-da, no more new brother
Blow her kisses bye-bye, tell mama you love her (mommy!)
Now we'll go play in the sand, build a castle and junk
But first, just help dad with two more things out the trunk

Just the two of us.. (2X)
And when we ride!
Just the two of us.. (2X)
Just you and I!
Just the two of us.. (2X)
And when we ride!
Just the two of us.. (2X)
Just you and I!

Just the two of us.. (4X)

[Eminem]
Just me and you baby
is all we need in this world
Just me and you
Your da-da will always be there for you
Your da-da's always gonna love you
Remember that
If you ever need me I will always be here for you
If you ever need anything, just ASK
Da-da will be right there
Your da-da loves you
I love you baby

As The World Turns


[Chorus: Repeat 2X]

I dont know why this world keep turning
Round and Round
But I wish it would stop, and let me off right now

Yes man
As the World Turns
We all experience things in life
Trials and Tribulations
That we all must go through
When someone wants to test us
When someone tries our patience

[Eminem]
I hang with a bunch of hippies
And wacky tobacco planters
Who swallow lit roaches
And light up like jack-o-lanterns
Outsiders baby, and we suing the courts
Cuz we're dope as fuck and only get a 2 in the source
They never should've booted me out of reform school
Deformed fool,takin a shit in a warm pool
They threw me out the Ramada Inn
I said it wasn't me, I got a twin (Oh my god its you! Not again!)
It all started when my mother took my bike away
Cuz I murdered my guinea pig and stuck him in the microwave
After that, It was straight to the 40 ouncers
Slappin teachers, and jackin off in front of my counselors
Class clown freshman, dressed like Les Nessman
Fuck the next lesson, I'll past the test guessin
And all the other kids said Eminem's a dishead,
He'll never last, the only class he'll pass is phys ed
May be true, till I told this bitch in gym class
That she was too fat to swim laps, she needed Slim Fast (Who Me?)
Yeah bitch you so big you walked into big Tanny's and stepped on Jenny Craig
She picked me up to snap me like a skinny twig
Put me in the headlock, then I thought of my guinea pig
I felt the evilness and started transformin (RARRRR!)
It began storming, I heard a bunch of cheering fans swarming
Grabbed that bitch by her hair
Drug her across the ground
And took her up to the highest diving board and tossed her down
Sorry coach, its too late to tell me stop
While I drop this bitch face down and watch her belly flop

[Chorus]

As the World Turns
These are the days of our lives
These are the things that we must go through
Day by day

[Eminem]
We drive around in million dollar sports cars
While little kids hide this tape from their parents like bad report cards
Outsiders, and we suing the courts
Cuz we dope as fuck and only get a 2 in The Source
Hypercondriac, hanging out at the laundromat
Where all the raunchy fat white trashy blondes be at
Dressed like a sailor, standin by a pale of garbage
Its almost dark and I'm still tryna nail a trailor park bitch
I met a slut and said "What up, its nice to meet ya"
I'd like to treat ya to a Faygo and a slice of pizza
But I'm broke as fuck and I don't get paid till the first of next month
But if you care to join me, I was bout to roll this next blunt
But I aint got no weed, no phillies, or no papers
Plus I'm a rapist and a repeated prison escapist
So gimme all your money
And don't try nothin funny
Cuz you know your stinkin ass is too fat to try to outrun me
I went to grab my gun
Thats when her ass put it on me
Wit an uppercut and hit me with a basket of laundry
I fell through the glass doors
Started causin a scene
Then slid across the floor and flew right into a washin machine
Jumped up with a broken back
Thank god I was smokin crack all day
And doped up off coke and smack
All I wanted to do was rape the bitch and snatch her purse
Now I wanna kill her
But so I gotta catch her first
Ran through Rally's parkin lot and took a shortcut
Saw the house she ran up in
And shot her fuckin porch up
Kicked the door down to murder this divorced slut
Looked around the room
Thats when I seen the bedroom door shut
I know you're in there bitch! I got my gun cocked!
You might as well come out now
She said "Come in, its unlocked!"
I walked in and all I smelled was Liz Claiborne
And seen her spread across the bed naked watchin gay porn
She said "Come her big boy, lets get acquainted"
I turned around to run, twisted my ankle and sprained it
She came at me at full speed, nothin could stop her
I shot her five times and every bullet bounced off her
I started to beg "No, please let go"
But she swallowed my fuckin leg whole like an egg roll
With one leg left, now I'm hoppin around crippled
I grabbed my pocket knife and sliced off her right nipple
Just trying to buy me some time, then I remembered this magic trick
Den Den Den Den Den Den, Go go gadget dick!
Whipped that shit out, and aint no doubt about it
It hit the ground and caused an earthquake and power outage
I shouted "Now bitch, lets see who gets the best!"
Stuffed that shit in crooked and fucked that fat slut to death (Ahh!! Ahhh!)
Come here bitch!
Come here!
Take this motherfuckin dick!
Bitch, come here!

[Chorus to fade]

And as we go along
Throughout the days of our lives
We all face small obstacles and challenges everyday
That we must go through
These are the things that surround us through our atmosphere
Every day
Every single day the world keeps turning

Any Man


Hi!
Original Bad Boy on the case, cover your face
Came in the place blowed, and sprayed Puffy with Mase
I laced the weed with insect repellant, better check the smelly
Eminem starts with E, better check the spelling
with a capital, somebody grab me a Snapple
I got an aspirin capsule trapped in my adam's apple
Somebody dropped me on my head, and I was sure
that my mother did it, but the bitch won't admit it was her
I slit her stomach open with a scalpel when she was six months
and said, "I'm ready now bitch - ain't you feelin these kicks cunt?"
The world ain't ready for me yet, I can tell
I'll probably have a cell next to the furnace in hell
I'm sick of these sperm cells with syphillis germs
and I'm hotter than my dick is, when I piss and it burns
I kick you in the tummy until you sick to your stomach
and vomit so much blood that your clothes stick to you from it
(Yuck!) Hit you in the head with a brick til you plummet
If y'all don't like me, you can suck my dick til you numb it
And all that gibberish you was spittin, you need to kill it
Cause your style is like dyin in my sleep, I don't feel it
Nakarat: Eminem
Cause any man who would jump in front of a minivan
for twenty grand and a bottle of pain pills and a minithin
is fuckin crazy -- you hear me? Ha?
Is fuckin crazy -- hello, hi!
Cause any man who would jump in front of a minivan
for twenty grand and a bottle of pain pills and a minithin
is fuckin crazy -- do you hear me?
Is fuckin crazy
[Eminem]
I'm ice grillin you, starin you down with a gremlin grin
I'm Eminem, you're a fag in a women's gym
I'm Slim, the Shady is really a fake alias
to save me with in case I get chased by space aliens
A brainiac, with a cranium packed, full of more uranium
than a maniac Saudi Arabian
A highly combustible head, spazmatic
strapped to a Kraftmatic adjustable bed
Laid up in the hospital in critical condition
I flatlined; jumped up and ran from the mortician
High speed, IV full of thai weed
Lookin Chinese, with my knees stuck together like siamese
twins, joined at the groin like lesbians
Uhh, pins and needles, hypodermic needles and pins
I hope God forgives me for my sins -- it probably all depends
on if I keep on killin my girlfriends
Nakarat: Eminem
Cause any man who would jump in front of a minivan
for twenty grand and a bottle of pain pills and a minithin
is fuckin crazy -- you hear me? Ha?
Is fuckin crazy -- listen!!
Cause any man who would jump in front of a minivan
for twenty grand and a bottle of pain pills and a minithin
is fuckin crazy -- you hear me?
Is fuckin crazy
[Eminem]
Last night I O.D.'d on rush, mushrooms and dust
and got rushed to the hospital to get my system flushed
(Shucks!) I'm an alcoholic and that's all I can say
I call in to work, cause all I do is frolic and play
I swallow grenades, and take about a bottle a day
of Tylenol 3, and talk about how violent I'll be (RRARRRRH)
Give me eleven Excederin my head'll spin
Medicine'll get me revvin like a 747 jet engine
Scratched my balls til I shredded skin
"Doctor, check this rash, look how red it's been"
"It's probably AIDS!" Forget it then
I strike a still pose and hit you with some ill flows
that don't even make sense, like dykes usin dildos
So reach in your billfolds, for ten ducats
and pick up this Slim Shady shit that's on Rawkus
Somethin somethin somethin, somethin I get weeded
My daughter scribbled over that rhyme, I couldn't read it
Damn!

Bad Guys Always Die


(feat. Dr. Dre)

The Wild.. Gotham
The Wild.. West [*BANG BANG, BANG*]
Ha ha, riiiiide..

[Dr. Dre]
All you see is the sun, reflectin off of the gun
I'm ready for the showdown, that go down at one
Sweat on my brow, let's settle it now
I'ma show you how real cowboys get down
I'm polishin gold, waitin for this drama to unfold
I got a {blunt} rolled
Feelin bold, gangsters blood runs cold
It's time to reload this old .45 colt
The wind's gusty, it's hot, muggy and dusty
Bust a couple shots, make sure I'm not rusty
It's passed noon, he should be here soon
Sip a little moonshine inside a saloon
All of a sudden I can hear the sound of hoofs
Sounds like a thousand wolves
I cock back, put the toast in the holster and froze
I pose like a poster, he's closer than close
I hold the heat sturdy, I heard he fight's dirty
but I'ma put thirty inside him and leave early
And just when I went to fill him with hot lead
I put the gun to his head, and this is what he said

[Eminem]
You never met me, and you'll probably never see me again
but I know you - the name's Slim - you want revenge?
Then don't shoot, I'm in the same boots as you
I'm tellin the truth, I got a price on my head too, cause when you..

[Chorus:]

You ride like a cowboy toward the sun
And life ain't fun, when you're on the run
Got your gold and you got your gun
But life as an outlaw just begun
Got your shotgun by your side
Got your horse and you got your pride
You ride til there ain't no place to hide
It's sad cause the bad guys always die

[Dr. Dre + Eminem]
He was "Shady," I seen by the look on his face
He said take ten paces {shit} I took eight
Spun around and I aimed straight for the brain
My {shit} went bang but it only fired a blank, he said
(You need bullets, hurry up run!) [*imitating Slick Rick*]
I put a clip in the gun, and pointed at his lungs
We both drew at the same time and stood stunned
(Go ahead, shoot me, but I'm not the one you want)
I figured he was tellin the truth, that's why I didn't shoot
So what we gon' do, it's on you
(Do you recall when you and Snoop was a group?)
The Chronic!
(Well all we gotta do is find a map to part two)
(And plus I know who's got it)
Who?
(Some old dude, he's got 26 plaques and he already sold two)
Loaded up my saddle, got ready for battle
Hid two pieces of gold inside of my saddle
We rolled two miles until we hit the spot
An old ghost town that everybody forgot
A place where they used to smoke chronic a lot
Slim grabbed the shotgun (Dre here's the plot)

[Eminem]
This is the spot, they call him Doc Loveless
He's goin around sayin he took the game from us
(Let's shoot him in his kneecaps, he'll never see it comin)
But he ain't got no legs, they cut 'em off at the stomach
He's got mechanical legs, he spins webs
Plus he's well respected by the hip-hop heads
Our mission - is to get him to stop layin eggs
And we can put him on his back down a flight of steps

[Dr. Dre]
I drew two guns, spun them on my fingers
Kicked the swingin doors in, started gun slinging
I could hear somebody singin - it sounded like a "G Thang,"
and a verse from "Keep Their Heads Ringin"
I said "It's Dre's Day," and started to spray
Against 1800, he pulls a AK
Hollow tips started flyin every which way

[Eminem]
That's when I seen Dre in trouble and came with the gauge
I fired the first shot, spun his body around
He hit the ground and landed upside down
Dre grabbed the map, the plaques and the gold
I grabbed two girlies and a {blunt} that's rolled

[Chorus 2X]

Always die..
The Wild.. Gotham
The Wild.. West [*BANG BANG, BANG*]
Ha ha, riiiiide..

Bad Meets Evil


[intro]

[Cowboy]
I reckon you ain't familiar with these here parts
You know, there's a story behind that there saloon
Twenty years ago, two outlaws took this whole town over
Sheriffs couldn't stop em
Quickest damn gun slingers I've ever seen
Got murdered in cold blood
That ol' saloon there was their lil' home away from home
They say the ghosts of Bad and Evil still live in that tavern
And on a quiet night
You can still hear the footsteps of Slim Shady and Royce Da Five-Nine

[Eminem]
I don't speak, I float in the air wrapped in a sheet
I'm not a real person, I'm a ghost trapped in a beat
I translate when my voice is read through a sismograph
And a noise is bred, picked up and transmitted through Royce's head (AAHHH)
Trapped him in his room, possessed him and hoist his bed
Till the evilness flows through his blood like poisonous lead
Told him each one of his boys is dead
I asked him to come to the dark side, he made a choice and said

[Royce]
Who hard? yo I done heard worse
We can get in two cars and accelerate at each other
To see which one'll swerve first
Two blind bandits panic, whose mental capacity holds
That of a globe on top of nine other planets
Kissed the cheek of the devil
Intelligence level is hell-ier than treble peakin on speakers in the ghetto
Dismissal, I'm not a fair man, disgraced the race of a atheist
Intercepting missles wit my bare hands like a patriot
One track sliced without swords, I buried the Christ corpse
In my past life when the Black Knight mounted the white horse
And stay over-worked, its like the Nazis in the nations
Collaborating, attemptin to take over the earth

[Eminem]
Cuz this is what happens when Bad Meets Evil
We hit the trees till we look like Vietnamese people
He's Evil, and I'm Bad like Steve Segal
Above the Law cuz I don't agree wit police either (shit, me neither)
We ain't eager to be legal
So please leave me wit the keys to your Jeep Eagle
I breathe ether in three amounts
When I stab myself in the knee with a diseased needle
Releasin rage on anybody in squeezing range
Cold enough to make the seasons change into freezing rain
(He's insane) No I'm not, I just want to shoot up and I'm pissed off
Cuz I can't find a decent vain

[Royce]
The disaster wit dreds
I'm Bad enough to commit suicide and survive long enough
To kill my soul after I'm dead
When in danger it's funny actually my flavor's similar to a waiter
Cuz I serve any stranger wit money
I spray a hundred, man until they joint chains
While slippin bullets at point blank range like they was punches
Piss on a flag and burn it, murder you then come to your funeral
Serve this lobbyist, strangle your body then confirm you
Whippin human ass, throwin blows crackin jaws
Wit my fists wrapped in gause, dipped in glue and glass
I'm blazin MC's, at the same time amazin MC's
Somehow MC's ain't that eye-brow raisin to me
>From all of angles of us, flash a mack loud enough to cast a avalanche
And bust till volcanoes errupt

[interlude]
*phone rings*
Hello? (Billy) Aiyyo what's up (we're comin to get you)
STOP, THEY KNOW IT'S US!!

[Eminem]
I used to be a loudmouth, remember me? (uh-ah)
I'm the one who burned your house down (oh)
Well I'm out now (shit), and this time I'm comin back to blow your house up
And I ain't gon leave you a window to jump out of
Give me two fat tabs and three shrooms
And you won't see me like fat people in steam rooms
And when I go to hell and I'm gettin ready to leave
I'ma put air in a bag and charge people to breathe

[Royce + (Eminem)]
Cuz this is what happens when Bad Meets Evil
And we hit the trees till we look like Vietnamese people
He's Evil, and I'm Bad like Steve Segal
Against peaceful, see you in hell for the sequel
(We'll be waitin) See you in hell
Wall Street, Royce Da Five-Nine, Slim Shady
See you in hell for the sequel (bye bye)
Bad Meets Evil, what? (till next time)

[Cowboy]
And so that's the story when Bad Meets Evil
Two of the most wanted individuals in the county
Made Jesse James and Billy the Kid look like law-abiding citizens
It's too bad they had to go out the way they did
Got shot in the back comin out of that ol' saloon
But their spirits still live on till this day
Shhh...[spits] wait, did y'all hear that?
[Footsteps and windblowing]

Bitch Please II



(feat. Dr. Dre, Nate Dogg, Snoop Dogg, Xzibit)

[Dre]
Yeah whattup Detroit?
[Snoop]
Nu-uh, nu-uh nuh-no he didn't!
Ahhh! They didn't do it again,
what-what, what-what?
Did you shit on these niggaz two times Dr. Dre?
[Dre]
Oh fo' sho'!
[Snoop]
Uh-uh, naw, ya smell that?
This is special right here
What-what, what-what-what?
Yeah, it's a toast to the boogie baby
Uhh, to the boogie-oogie-oogie
Yeah, y'know! What's crackin Dre?

[Dr. Dre]
Just let me lay back and kick some mo' simplistic pimp shit
on Slim's shit and start riots like Limp Bizkit (Limp Bizkit)
Throw on 'Guilty Conscience' at concerts
and watch mosh pits til motherfuckers knock each other unconcious
(Watch out now!) Some of these crowds that Slim draws
is rowdy as Crenshaw Boulevard when it's packed and fulla cars
Some of these crowds me and Snoop draw +IS+ niggaz from Crenshaw
from Long Beach to South Central
[*LOUD SCREAM*] Whoa, not these niggaz again
These grown-ass ignorant men with hair-triggers again
(Hehe) You and what army could harm me?
D-R-E and Shady, with Doggy from Long Beach
(East-syde!) Came a long way, to makin these songs play
It'll be a wrong move, to stare at me the wrong way
I got a long uz', and I carry it all day
(Blaow!) Sometimes it's like a nightmare, just bein Andre,
but I..

[Snoop Dogg]
somehow, someway - tell 'em, nigga
You know about Dogg-ay (Snoop Dogg)
Now let me cut these niggaz up and show em where da fuck I'm comin from
I get the party crackin from the shit that I be spittin son
Hit-and-run, get it done, get the funds, split and run
Got about fifty guns, and I love all of 'em the same - bang bang!
Damn baby girl what's your name?
I forgot - what'd you say it was? Damn a nigga buzzed
Hangin in the club, with my nephew Eminem
(Whassup Slim?) Whattup cuz? (Whattup Snoop?)
The Great White American Hope, done hooked up
with the King of the motherfuckin West coast, bay-bayy!

[Chorus: Nate Dogg (+Snoop)]

And you don't really wanna fuck, with me
Only nigga that I trust, is me
Fuck around and make me bust, this heat
[Snoop] That's, the devil, they always wanna dance

[Xzibit]
I'm the Head Nigga In Charge, I'm watchin you move
You're found dead in your garage, with ten o'clock news coverage
Gotta love it, cause I expose the facade
Your little lungs is too small to hotbox with God
All jokes aside, come bounce with us
Standin over you with a twelve gauge, about to bust
It's like ashes to ashes and dust to dust
I might leave in the bodybag, but never in cuffs
So who do you trust? They just not rugged enough
When things get rough I'm in the club shootin with Puff
Bitch, please - you must have a mental disease
Assume the position and get back down on your knees - c'mon

[Chorus 2X]

[Eminem - impersonating Snoop]
Awww naww, big Slim Dogg
Eighty pound balls, dick six inch long
Back up, in the, heezy BAY-BAY
He's Sha-day!

[Snoop]
He's so cra-zay!

[Eminem]
Hahaha! Gimme the mic, let me recite, 'til Timothy White
pickets outside the Interscope offices every night
What if he's right? I'm just a criminal, makin a living
off of the world's misery - what in the world gives me the right
to say what I like, and walk around flippin the bird
Livin the urban life, like a white kid from the 'burbs
Dreamin at night of screamin at mom, schemin to leave
Run away from home and grow to be as evil as me
I just want you all to notice me and people to see
that somewhere deep down, there's a decent human being in me
It just can't be found, so the reason you've been seeing this me
is cause this is me now, the recent dude who's being this mean
So when you see me, dressin up like a nerd on TV
or heard the CD usin the fag word so freely
it's just me being me, here want me to tone it down?
[LOWER pitch] Suck my fuckin dick, you faggot
You happy now? Look here

[Eminem - impersonating Snoop]
I start some trouble everywhere that I go (that I go)
Ask the bouncers in the club cause they know (cause they know)
I start some shit they throw me out the back do' (the back do')
Come back and shoot the club up with a fo'-fo' (a fo'-fo')

[Chorus 2X]

Brain Damage


[Doctor] Scalpel
[Nurse] Here
[Doctor] Sponge
[Nurse] Here
[Doctor] Wait.. he's convulsing, he's convulsing!
[Nurse] Ah!
[Doctor] We're gonna have to shock him!
[Nurse] Oh my! Oh my God!
[Doctor] We're gonna have to shock him!
[Nurse] Oh my God!

[Eminem]
These are the results of a thousand electric volts
A neck with bolts, "Nurse we're losin him, check the pulse!"
A kid who refused to respect adults
Wore spectacles with taped frames and a freckled nose
A corny lookin white boy, scrawny and always ornery
Cause I was always sick of brawny bullies pickin on me
And I might snap, one day just like that
I decided to strike back and flatten every tire on the bike rack
(Whosssssh) My first day in junior high, this kid said,
"It's you and I, three o'clock sharp this afternoon you die"
I looked at my watch it was one twenty
"I already gave you my lunch money what more do you want from me?!?"
He said, "Don't try to run from me, you'll just make it worse..."
My palms were sweaty, and I started to shake at first
Something told me, "Try to fake a stomach ache it works"
I screamed, "Owww! My appendix feels like they could burst!
Teacher, teacher, quick I need a naked nurse!"
[N] "What's the matter?"
[E] "I don't know, my leg, it hurts!"
[N] "Leg?!? I thought you said it was your tummy?!?"
[E] "Oh, I mean it is, but I also got a bum knee!"
[N] "Mr. Mathers, the fun and games are over.
And just for that stunt, you're gonna get some extra homework."
[E] "But don't you wanna give me after school detention?"
[N] "Nah, that bully wants to beat your ass and I'ma let him."

[Chorus: repeat 2X]

Brain damage, ever since the day I was born
Drugs is what they used to say I was on
They say I never knew which way I was goin
But everywhere I go they keep playin my song

[Eminem]
Brain damage..
Way before my baby daughter Hailey
I was harassed daily by this fat kid named D'Angelo Bailey
An eighth grader who acted obnoxious, cause his father boxes
so everyday he'd shove me in the lockers
One day he came in the bathroom while I was pissin
And had me in the position to beat me into submission
He banged my head against the urinal til he broke my nose,
Soaked my clothes in blood, grabbed me and choked my throat
I tried to plead and tell him, "We shouldn't beef"
But he just wouldn't leave, he kept chokin me and I couldn't breathe
He looked at me and said, "You gonna die honkey!"
The principal walked in (What's going on in here?)
and started helpin him stomp me
I made them think they beat me to death
Holdin my breath for like five minutes before they finally left
Then I got up and ran to the janitor's storage booth
Kicked the door hinge loose and ripped out the four inch screws
Grabbed some sharp objects, brooms, and foreign tools
"This is for every time you took my orange juice,
or stole my seat in the lunchroom and drank my chocolate milk.
Every time you tipped my tray and it dropped and spilt.
I'm gettin you back bully! Now once and for good."
I cocked the broomstick back and swung hard as I could
and beat him over the head with it til I broke the wood
Knocked him down, stood on his chest with one foot..
.. Made it home, later that same day
Started reading a comic, and suddenly everything became gray
I couldn't even see what I was tryin to read
I went deaf, and my left ear started to bleed
My mother started screamin, "What are you on, drugs?!?
Look at you, you're gettin blood all over my rug!" (Sorry!)
She beat me over the head with the remote control
opened a hole, and my whole brain fell out of my skull
I picked it up and screamed, "Look bitch, what have you done?!?"
[M] "Oh my God, I'm sorry son"
[E] "Shut up you cunt!" I said, "Fuck it!"
Took it and stuck it back up in my head
then I sewed it shut and put a couple of screws in my neck

[Chorus]

[Eminem]
Brain damage..
It's brain damage..
I got brain damage..
It's brain damage..
It's probably brain damage..
It's brain damage..
Brain damage..
I got brain damage..